bluidkiti
12-10-2009, 02:18 PM
12/11
Wisdom for Today
Another defect of character that I had to watch out for was inequality -- thinking that I was better than others or worse than others. Closely related was grandiosity, pretending that I was king of the world and all-powerful, in many ways pretending that I was god. This grandiosity also made me think that other people owed me. When I was actively drinking and using, I felt as if others should give me whatever I wanted. If I turned them on, I acted like I owned these individuals. This was particularly true of the women I dated. But even with my best using buddies, if I turned them on, I would act like I was king. I expected something in return. Even early in recovery I found myself judging others, looking for their faults, so that I could feel better about myself.
On the other hand there was shame, an attitude about myself that told me that I was a damaged product. I was less than others. Shame was pervasive in my belief system and had me convinced that I was a real loser. I was not worthy of anyone's care or concern. This was particularly true in my relationship with God. How could a Higher Power possibly care about someone as worthless as I was? In recovery it became necessary to learn about equality, that I was not better and no worse than anyone else. I was just like everyone else. I was human, capable of great mistakes, capable of great success. Regardless of success or failure, I was still a worthwhile human being. I needed to change my belief system and see that God cared about me not because I was worthy, but simply because He chooses to care about me - the good, the bad and the ugly. Am I making progress with equality?
Meditations for the Heart
The program is a fellowship of hope. This is not a hope that is overly optimistic and looks at the world through rose-colored glasses. It also is not a hope that is pessimistic that is doomed to fail. It is a fellowship of hope that is real and genuine. Ask those individuals who are making it about hope, and they respond, "Hope is the free gift of God that comes through surrender." It is not the profound success that people have in the program that gives us hope, nor is it the failures we experience that makes us turn to this hope. Hope is simply a free gift we receive that is most definitely real. Hope fills our hearts and strengthens us for the new day. Hope fills our hearts and brings both comfort and serenity. Hope brings security, and hope allows for each new breath. This is not something we receive in isolation, but it is given to us freely through our participation in the program. Have I found this gift called hope?
Petitions to my Higher Power
God,
Each day I am presented with the temptation to see myself as better than others or worse than others. Help this day to fight this temptation and to see myself as You see me, for I know that You see me as Your child, equal and worthy. Let me grab onto this thing called hope and not let go, for in You and in following Your will I am given this gift - not because of my success or my failure, but simply because You choose to give this to me freely.
Amen.
-----
You are reading from the book Food for Thought.
Setting Realistic Goals
Part of growing up is learning to set realistic goals for ourselves. Our grandiose egos used to dare us into dreaming great dreams, which led to feelings of failure when the dreads did not materialize. If we expect the impossible of ourselves, we are bound to be disappointed.
Those of us who come into OA with many pounds to lose need to be realistic about the amount of time we allow for achieving the weight loss. We also need to be realistic about the fact that we may never look like fashion models. If we expect all other problems to vanish upon the attainment of a weight goal, we are not being realistic.
Maintaining abstinence, working the Twelve Steps, and attending meetings regularly keeps us in touch with the reality of our disease. The goals we set for ourselves are determined by where we are in actuality right now. Some of us have farther to go than others. The goals we set should challenge us rather than defeat us before we begin.
Show me the goals that are realistic for me today.
-----
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Feelings are everywhere--gentle. --J. Masai
Throughout the day we experience many feelings. Losing something makes us angry. Fighting with a friend makes us sad. Perhaps we're lonely because no one is home. Getting an unexpected treat makes us happy. Our feelings come and go just like the hours of our lives.
Letting our feelings be whatever they are is good. They'll go away in time. We may not like all feelings; sadness or anger may be uncomfortable, but being human means we'll have many different feelings each day. If we're quiet with them, they'll help us grow and understand others better, and then they will suddenly be gone, replaced perhaps by a feeling we like more.
Will I be able to accept my feelings today whether I like them or not?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The art of living lies not in eliminating but in growing with troubles. -- Bernard M. Baruch
Naturally, we wish to avoid pain and difficulty, but life experience and a measure of reflection show us that most of what comes our way is beyond our control. We'll never outwit all the possibilities for trouble, even if we live to be 100 years old. We have often failed to learn from trouble because we cast ourselves in the roles of passive men and victims. We pointed outside ourselves and said, "Look at what is happening to poor me!"
When we use trouble as our teacher, we develop the art of living. We are taking a spiritual approach, using our Higher Power as our guide. We can choose today to use our difficulties for our learning and growth. We might ask, "What can I learn from this experience about myself as a man? How can I use this to strengthen myself for the future?" Serenity develops, not by eliminating life's difficulties, but by having a reliable relationship with our Higher Power in the midst of it all.
With God as my guide, I will use whatever comes my way as an opportunity for growth.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Occupation is essential. --Virginia Woolf
Having desires, setting goals, and achieving them are necessary to our fulfillment. There is purpose to our lives, even when we can't clearly see our direction; even when we doubt our abilities to contribute. Let us continue to respond to our opportunities.
Many of us experienced the clouds of inaction in earlier periods waiting, waiting, waiting, hoping our circumstances would change, even praying they would, but taking no responsibility for changing what was in our power. Inaction caged us. Stripped of power, life held little or no meaning. However, we've been given another chance. The program has changed our lives. We have a reason for living, each day, even the days we feel hopeless and worthless.
Maybe we are without a goal at this time. Perhaps the guidance is not catching our attention. We can become quiet with ourselves and let our daydreams act as indicators. We have something essential to do, and we are being given all the chances we'll need to fulfill our purpose. We can trust in our worth, our necessity to others.
I will remember, the program came to me. I must have a part to play. I will look and listen for my opportunities today.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Affirmations
One of our choices in recovery is choosing what we want to think - using our mental energy positively.
Positive mental energy, positive thinking, does not mean we think unrealistically or revert to denial. If we don't like something, we respect our own opinion. If we spot a problem, we're honest about it. if something isn't working out, we accept reality. But we don't dwell on the negative parts of our experience.
Whatever we give energy to, we empower.
There is magic in empowering the good, because whatever we empower grows bigger. One way to empower the good is through affirmations: simple positive statements we make to ourselves: I love myself... I'm good enough... My life is good...I'm glad I'm alive today... What I want and need is coming to me... I can...
Our choice in recovery is not whether to use affirmations. We've been affirming thoughts and beliefs since we were old enough to speak. The choice in recovery is what we want to affirm.
Today, I will empower the good in myself, others, and life. I'm willing to release, or let go of, negative thought patterns and replace them with positive ones. I will choose what I want to affirm, and I will make it good.
The world can not change overnight, nor can I. Just one step at a time, one day at a time, I'm exactly where I need to be to get to exactly where I am going. I trust this process today. --Ruth Fishel
God help me to stay sober and clean today!
-----
http://www.recoveryinternet.com/MLOLGDec11.jpg
-----
Fully Committed to Now
Why We Are Not Shown the Big Picture
Sometimes, we may find ourselves wishing we knew what our lives are going to look like or what gifts and challenges are going to be presented to us in the coming months or years. We may want to know if the relationship we’re in now will go the distance or if our goals will be realized. Perhaps we feel like we need help making a decision and we want to know which choice will work out best. We may consult psychics, tarot cards, our dreams, and many other sources in the hopes of finding out what the future holds. Usually, at most, we may catch glimpses. And even though we think we would like to know the whole story in all its details, the truth is that we would probably be overwhelmed and exhausted if we knew everything that is going to happen to us.
Just think of your life as you’ve lived it up to this point. If you are like most of us, you have probably done more and faced more than you could have ever imagined. If someone had told you as a child of all the jobs and relationships you would experience, along with each one’s inherent ups and downs, you would have become overwhelmed. With your head full of information about the future, you would have had a very hard time experiencing your life in the present moment, which is where everything actually happens.
In many ways, not knowing what the future has in store brings out in us the qualities we need to grow. For example, it would have been difficult to commit yourself to certain people or projects if you knew they wouldn’t ultimately work out. Yet, it was through your commitment to see them through that you experienced the lessons you needed to grow. Looking back on your life, you would likely be hard pressed to say that anything in your past should not have happened. In fact, your most challenging experiences with their inevitable lessons may have ultimately brought you the greatest rewards. Not knowing the future keeps us just where we need to be—fully committed and in the present moment. Published with permission from Daily OM
Wisdom for Today
Another defect of character that I had to watch out for was inequality -- thinking that I was better than others or worse than others. Closely related was grandiosity, pretending that I was king of the world and all-powerful, in many ways pretending that I was god. This grandiosity also made me think that other people owed me. When I was actively drinking and using, I felt as if others should give me whatever I wanted. If I turned them on, I acted like I owned these individuals. This was particularly true of the women I dated. But even with my best using buddies, if I turned them on, I would act like I was king. I expected something in return. Even early in recovery I found myself judging others, looking for their faults, so that I could feel better about myself.
On the other hand there was shame, an attitude about myself that told me that I was a damaged product. I was less than others. Shame was pervasive in my belief system and had me convinced that I was a real loser. I was not worthy of anyone's care or concern. This was particularly true in my relationship with God. How could a Higher Power possibly care about someone as worthless as I was? In recovery it became necessary to learn about equality, that I was not better and no worse than anyone else. I was just like everyone else. I was human, capable of great mistakes, capable of great success. Regardless of success or failure, I was still a worthwhile human being. I needed to change my belief system and see that God cared about me not because I was worthy, but simply because He chooses to care about me - the good, the bad and the ugly. Am I making progress with equality?
Meditations for the Heart
The program is a fellowship of hope. This is not a hope that is overly optimistic and looks at the world through rose-colored glasses. It also is not a hope that is pessimistic that is doomed to fail. It is a fellowship of hope that is real and genuine. Ask those individuals who are making it about hope, and they respond, "Hope is the free gift of God that comes through surrender." It is not the profound success that people have in the program that gives us hope, nor is it the failures we experience that makes us turn to this hope. Hope is simply a free gift we receive that is most definitely real. Hope fills our hearts and strengthens us for the new day. Hope fills our hearts and brings both comfort and serenity. Hope brings security, and hope allows for each new breath. This is not something we receive in isolation, but it is given to us freely through our participation in the program. Have I found this gift called hope?
Petitions to my Higher Power
God,
Each day I am presented with the temptation to see myself as better than others or worse than others. Help this day to fight this temptation and to see myself as You see me, for I know that You see me as Your child, equal and worthy. Let me grab onto this thing called hope and not let go, for in You and in following Your will I am given this gift - not because of my success or my failure, but simply because You choose to give this to me freely.
Amen.
-----
You are reading from the book Food for Thought.
Setting Realistic Goals
Part of growing up is learning to set realistic goals for ourselves. Our grandiose egos used to dare us into dreaming great dreams, which led to feelings of failure when the dreads did not materialize. If we expect the impossible of ourselves, we are bound to be disappointed.
Those of us who come into OA with many pounds to lose need to be realistic about the amount of time we allow for achieving the weight loss. We also need to be realistic about the fact that we may never look like fashion models. If we expect all other problems to vanish upon the attainment of a weight goal, we are not being realistic.
Maintaining abstinence, working the Twelve Steps, and attending meetings regularly keeps us in touch with the reality of our disease. The goals we set for ourselves are determined by where we are in actuality right now. Some of us have farther to go than others. The goals we set should challenge us rather than defeat us before we begin.
Show me the goals that are realistic for me today.
-----
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Feelings are everywhere--gentle. --J. Masai
Throughout the day we experience many feelings. Losing something makes us angry. Fighting with a friend makes us sad. Perhaps we're lonely because no one is home. Getting an unexpected treat makes us happy. Our feelings come and go just like the hours of our lives.
Letting our feelings be whatever they are is good. They'll go away in time. We may not like all feelings; sadness or anger may be uncomfortable, but being human means we'll have many different feelings each day. If we're quiet with them, they'll help us grow and understand others better, and then they will suddenly be gone, replaced perhaps by a feeling we like more.
Will I be able to accept my feelings today whether I like them or not?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The art of living lies not in eliminating but in growing with troubles. -- Bernard M. Baruch
Naturally, we wish to avoid pain and difficulty, but life experience and a measure of reflection show us that most of what comes our way is beyond our control. We'll never outwit all the possibilities for trouble, even if we live to be 100 years old. We have often failed to learn from trouble because we cast ourselves in the roles of passive men and victims. We pointed outside ourselves and said, "Look at what is happening to poor me!"
When we use trouble as our teacher, we develop the art of living. We are taking a spiritual approach, using our Higher Power as our guide. We can choose today to use our difficulties for our learning and growth. We might ask, "What can I learn from this experience about myself as a man? How can I use this to strengthen myself for the future?" Serenity develops, not by eliminating life's difficulties, but by having a reliable relationship with our Higher Power in the midst of it all.
With God as my guide, I will use whatever comes my way as an opportunity for growth.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Occupation is essential. --Virginia Woolf
Having desires, setting goals, and achieving them are necessary to our fulfillment. There is purpose to our lives, even when we can't clearly see our direction; even when we doubt our abilities to contribute. Let us continue to respond to our opportunities.
Many of us experienced the clouds of inaction in earlier periods waiting, waiting, waiting, hoping our circumstances would change, even praying they would, but taking no responsibility for changing what was in our power. Inaction caged us. Stripped of power, life held little or no meaning. However, we've been given another chance. The program has changed our lives. We have a reason for living, each day, even the days we feel hopeless and worthless.
Maybe we are without a goal at this time. Perhaps the guidance is not catching our attention. We can become quiet with ourselves and let our daydreams act as indicators. We have something essential to do, and we are being given all the chances we'll need to fulfill our purpose. We can trust in our worth, our necessity to others.
I will remember, the program came to me. I must have a part to play. I will look and listen for my opportunities today.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Affirmations
One of our choices in recovery is choosing what we want to think - using our mental energy positively.
Positive mental energy, positive thinking, does not mean we think unrealistically or revert to denial. If we don't like something, we respect our own opinion. If we spot a problem, we're honest about it. if something isn't working out, we accept reality. But we don't dwell on the negative parts of our experience.
Whatever we give energy to, we empower.
There is magic in empowering the good, because whatever we empower grows bigger. One way to empower the good is through affirmations: simple positive statements we make to ourselves: I love myself... I'm good enough... My life is good...I'm glad I'm alive today... What I want and need is coming to me... I can...
Our choice in recovery is not whether to use affirmations. We've been affirming thoughts and beliefs since we were old enough to speak. The choice in recovery is what we want to affirm.
Today, I will empower the good in myself, others, and life. I'm willing to release, or let go of, negative thought patterns and replace them with positive ones. I will choose what I want to affirm, and I will make it good.
The world can not change overnight, nor can I. Just one step at a time, one day at a time, I'm exactly where I need to be to get to exactly where I am going. I trust this process today. --Ruth Fishel
God help me to stay sober and clean today!
-----
http://www.recoveryinternet.com/MLOLGDec11.jpg
-----
Fully Committed to Now
Why We Are Not Shown the Big Picture
Sometimes, we may find ourselves wishing we knew what our lives are going to look like or what gifts and challenges are going to be presented to us in the coming months or years. We may want to know if the relationship we’re in now will go the distance or if our goals will be realized. Perhaps we feel like we need help making a decision and we want to know which choice will work out best. We may consult psychics, tarot cards, our dreams, and many other sources in the hopes of finding out what the future holds. Usually, at most, we may catch glimpses. And even though we think we would like to know the whole story in all its details, the truth is that we would probably be overwhelmed and exhausted if we knew everything that is going to happen to us.
Just think of your life as you’ve lived it up to this point. If you are like most of us, you have probably done more and faced more than you could have ever imagined. If someone had told you as a child of all the jobs and relationships you would experience, along with each one’s inherent ups and downs, you would have become overwhelmed. With your head full of information about the future, you would have had a very hard time experiencing your life in the present moment, which is where everything actually happens.
In many ways, not knowing what the future has in store brings out in us the qualities we need to grow. For example, it would have been difficult to commit yourself to certain people or projects if you knew they wouldn’t ultimately work out. Yet, it was through your commitment to see them through that you experienced the lessons you needed to grow. Looking back on your life, you would likely be hard pressed to say that anything in your past should not have happened. In fact, your most challenging experiences with their inevitable lessons may have ultimately brought you the greatest rewards. Not knowing the future keeps us just where we need to be—fully committed and in the present moment. Published with permission from Daily OM